The Conjuring (2013)

I love horror. In many was it is the most cinematic of all genres, because it relies so much on the successful use of cinematic space and visual storytelling. When done right, horror really is pure cinema. But it has to be done right, that is they key. The Conjuring was not done right. Here we have a movie that spends most of its time building up for the next pop-out shock scare scene. It is relentless and repetitive. One after another after another after another. I must have spent about 75% of the movie hiding behind my sweatshirt in anticipation of the next one. Horror that truly scares has to do more than just instantly shock. It needs to invade the viewer on a psychological level, it needs to linger, it is all about what is not shown, and what is suggested. An effective horror movie has maybe one or two of these shock tactic scenes, and the rest of the movie is a slow build, focusing on the psychological terror. Or if it is going to go the over-the-top route, then it takes a page from the Italians and revels in it. This movie has no idea what it wants to be. The scariest scene was when the daughter saw something behind the door, but that something was never shown. After the tenth prosthetic Halloween mask demon, it comes off as more ridiculous than anything else, but it expects us to take it seriously without any hint of irony. Now, this is supposedly based off a true story, and the fact that the creators have asked the audience to fully acknowledge the events without question is a problem. In reality, the Lorraine are mired in controversy. The famous Amityville haunting that they supposedly solved was later outed by one of the participants as being a "invented over many bottles of wine". The Snedeker Family that was supposedly haunted by demons turned out to be haunted by a different kind of demons; alcoholism and drug abuse. There is absolutely no skepticism in this movie aside from brief wise cracks. No, what is worse is that there is no uncertainty. Uncertainty is terrifying, more terrifying than outright acknowledging the existence of the supernatural or rationally explaining it. The most terrifying horror movies are the ones that do not answer the questions, that leave it up for debate. This would have been so much more scary if there had been more doubt. The last act which descends into almost Indiana Jones-like absurdity, and religion comes to save the day from Satan is just cheap. When it does work, The Conjuring calls to mind the fun of an X-Files episode, and when it does not it calls to mind the absurd antics of the Sci-Fi channel ghost hunters. Good thing today was Bargain Tuesday at the movies.